I guess I have marriage on the brain, ok?

Since I’m sort of planning a wedding or whatever, I have spurts of energy where I go online and do research about the usual things that go into planning a wedding.  Usually this ends up with me getting so sick of even thinking of having a stupid wedding that I end up slamming my laptop shut and curse the day this ring was ever put on my finger! 

But I come across crap like this every so often.  Message to Target, sellers of this hilarious shirt:  please.  This is such a tired and lame stereotype.  The poor, hapless, commitment-phobe man, getting conned by the woman who, I guess, “wins the game”.  This played-out idea is illustrated in other ways, of course: strippers at bachelor parties, for one.  Because the sad, downtrodden groom-to-be needs at least one more night of “freedom”.  I mean, he might as well be wearing an orange jumpsuit after the ceremony, because life is going to be total hell from then on!  Milk that bachelor party, mister, because that’s the last ounce of fun YOU’LL ever have!  Say your vows, sucker, so your bride can throw away the KEY! 

I’m just talking about A LITTLE more gender equality, folks.  Not to say that if this shirt had both the bride and groom frowning it would be funnier, but it would at least be fair.  And I don’t care if people who are buying it don’t really “mean” it, because it’s a “joke”.  Let’s face it: this shirt just isn’t funny, and if you’re buying it, you should call off your wedding immediately.